The new season of The Bachelor Australia is about to premiere on Channel 10, and the nation can’t wait to see Nick “The Honey Badger” Cummins take on 25 eligible Bachelorettes.
Honestly, how can this not be an absolute trainwreck? The best kind of trainwreck, of course. Let’s hope Vanessa Sunshine lives up to audience predictions.
As you stock up on your beverage of choice and head over to your mate’s for a viewing party (make sure you’re ready by 7:30pm AEST), familiarise yourself with the rules below for a guaranteed good time. Note: rules 1 to 3 will be enough to get you absolutely sloshed, provided the Honey Badger is his usual self in this season of The Bachelor Australia.
The (un)official Bachelor Australia drinking game
What you’ll need:
- A healthy supply of beer/wine/cider/whatever you like to session
- A bottle of spirits
- A phone or pen and paper to keep a tally
TAKE A SIP WHEN:
- Nick drops one of his iconic phrases (e.g. “like a rat up a drainpipe”, “sweating like a gypsy with a mortgage”, “tough as woodpecker lips”)
- Nick says “bloody” (keep a record of how many times he says it throughout the episode)
- Nick says “fair dinkum” (honestly you’ll be drunk in five minutes with the first three rules alone)
- Nick looks exceedingly uncomfortable
- Someone mentions Nick’s rugby career
- A Bachelorette compliments Nick’s luscious locks
- Someone says “journey”
FINISH YOUR DRINK WHEN:
- Someone says they’re looking for “true love”
- A Bachelorette sheds a tear when telling her background story
- Nick says something awkward or accidentally offends a Bachelorette
- A Bachelorette gives another girl a greasy
- Nick says “bloody” for the 10th time
HAVE A SHOT WHEN:
- The inspiration behind Nick’s nickname is mentioned
- A Bachelorette pretends to understand rugby and gets it horribly wrong
- Vanessa Sunshine savages another Bachelorette
POUR A SHOT FOR THE LAST PERSON TO SHOUT “HOLY TOMORROW! HOW GOOD?” WHEN:
- Nick says “busier than a one-armed bricklayer in Baghdad”
Have fun and, as always, drink responsibly.