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Report reveals Australia has worse internet speeds than Kazakhstan and Barbados

It’s time for your yearly reminder of how borked Aussie internet is.

Ookla’s Speed Test Global Index, which compares internet speeds around the world, has released its results for December 2017 and they aren’t pretty.

According to the index, Australia ended the year at totally piss-poor 55th place with a fixed broadband average download speeds of 25.88 Mbps.

Singapore topped the list with a blazing 161.21 Mbps. Can you imagine the pure joy? You could be streaming 4K on every device in the house and game online at the same time. Heaven is a Place on Earth, folks. It’s Singapore.

Iceland took second place with Hong Kong, South Korea and Romania rounding out the top five.

But plenty of countries less fortunate and less developed than Australia have better broadband than us.

Barbados, which is ranked 158th in the world by GDP, came 28th in the broadband rankings with average speeds of 48.67 Mbps.

To be fair, Barbados is a small place and easily connected. Australia’s geography is particularly challenging when it comes to running cables, but I don’t need to remind you how many times the NBN has muffed the rollout, changed its technological approach or blown out its budget.

Meanwhile, Kazakhstan is both geographically large (it’s the world’s largest landlocked country) and has a low GDP (50th). Let’s see where they fall on the rankings – oh damn, they beat us too (ranked 54th).

Are you sitting down? Worst of all, New Zealand is absolutely thrashing us with average broadband speeds reaching 64.43 Mbps, which is more than double the average in Australia.

Losing to the Kazakhs is one thing, but the Kiwis? Come on, Australia.

New Zealand and Australian rubgy players face off before the match.

It’s bad enough they win at this.

Spare a thought for Algerians. According to the index, Algeria currently has the worst broadband internet in the world, with an average speed of 3.48 Mbps, which is a great speed – for 1998.

After the expected rollout date changed twice, I gave up on waiting for the NBN last year and got a dish on my roof. I get a pretty steady 30 down now.

In fact, when it comes to mobile broadband speeds, Australia is doing just fine and is ranked 7th in the world with average speeds of 48.87 Mbps. So, theoretically, you are better off playing COD tethered to your phone in most cases. I tried this in one of my darkest moments, and it did work fine.

There are now about three million Aussies connected to the NBN with a target of eight million by 2020. Things do seem to improving, but it’s taking longer and costing more than it should have. Compromises have been made on the technology used, and in some cases, the NBN isn’t faster than people’s original ADSL connection.

Let’s hope for better results in 2018 in both rugby and internet speeds.

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