There is a terrifying new menace infiltrating the minds of young Aussies.
While Peppa Pig may appear harmless on the surface, it has been deemed a danger to Aussie kids. A controversial episode of the show has been yanked off pay TV channel Nick Jr for poisoning the minds of children.
The crime? Telling the nation’s sprogs that spiders “can’t hurt you.”
Look ye now upon the face of evil, aka ‘Mister Skinny Legs’:
This is not the first time that the Mister Skinny Legs episode has caused controversy. The 2004 episode was pulled from the ABC in 2012 for sending an “inappropriate message” to children.
Peppa Pig is from the UK, a place with far fewer poisonous spiders than Australia. Our great nation is famously home to such beauties as the redback, white-tailed, funnel-web and wolf spider.
Kids, Aussie spider bites fkn hurt and can even kill you.
Nick Jr, a children’s channel available on Foxtel, aired Mister Skinny Legs on August 25th. A Sydney mum told Fairfax that she complained to Foxtel, who said that the episode would stay on because the spider doesn’t “look real” and has a “smiley face.”
But after Fairfax contact Nick Jr, the channel buckled and took the episode off the air. So long, Mister Skinny Legs.
If we look purely at statistics, there are some other shows we’ll have to pull as well.
According to a comprehensive study led by Dr Ronelle Welton at the University of Melbourne’s Australian Venom Research Unit, we have other creatures to worry about.
Welton analyzed data from 2000 to 2013 and found that hornets, bees and wasps killed 27 people in Australia in that time period. Spiders killed NONE. Zero. Even that poor guy who got bitten twice (on the dong!) by a redback lived.
Snake bites also killed 27 people, and hornet, bee and wasp stings hospitalized more people than spider bites did.
When it came to non-venomous creatures, horses came out on top. In the thirteen-year time period, horses killed 74 people, beating usual suspects such as sharks (26) and crocs (19).
Since horses are such killers, I fully expect Channel Ten to take this dangerous show off the air soon.