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Australia’s dumbest criminal tries to steal empty cash register, fails miserably

Criminals aren’t always the clinical, ice-cold villains you see in movies.

Often they’re just big, dopey idiots like this guy.

A battler in Townsville has been caught on CCTV trying to rob a Harold Street mini-mart and doing just a truly terrible job.

*WATCH THE VIDEO IN THE PLAYER ABOVE – NON-AUSSIES CAN CHECK IT OUT OVER HERE*

At about 2:30pm on Saturday, the would-be robber bolted to the counter and tried to grab the register. BUT he forgot that power cords were a thing that existed – and came crashing to the floor as he struggled to wrestle it free.

He falls not once, but twice on an assorted array of lollies, eventually leaving with the cash register (and some choccies) in a stolen white 2014 Ford Ranger utility.

The store owner had the last laugh though, as the cash register was completely empty. So now after all that, all left with was a broken cash register.

Crime doesn’t pay, kids.

Especially when you forget to grab the money.

About the author

Technically, Riordan writes culture, politics and sport, but 80% of his words are direct quotes stolen from The Simpsons. He promises to tweet more at @riordanl and speaks words for The Zero Thumbs Down Podcast.

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