If there’s one thing capitalism is famous for, it’s coming up with product designs that nobody knew they even needed.
Who can forget the way that the notorious ShamWow blew up a few years ago – thanks in no small part to its incessantly irritating marketing strategy.
But Pony Up Daddy is a different beast entirely.
A cushioned saddle, designed to strap onto the back of an adult, Pony-Up Daddy advertises itself as an opportunity for child-parent bonding.
Tired of your child tearing your collar, breaking your jewellery, or inadvertently suffocating you while you take them on a mock pony ride about the living room? Pony Up Daddy is the product for you.
But who thought commissioning an advertising campaign imploring customers to “strap on, kneel down, and go for a ride” was a good idea?
Worse still is another slogan that appears on the product’s website: “Yank, tug and pull all you want… Daddy can take it!”
It’s almost like they’re doing this on purpose.
Pony Up Daddy promises hours of fun for its customers, shaking its proverbial fist – in classic ‘old man yells at cloud’ style – at Millennial parents, who would rather use apps for family fun, rather than good old fashioned roughhousing and age-inappropriate sexual innuendo.
To be fair, the durable, padded handle on the back of the Pony Up Daddy seems like a good way to prevent inadvertent injuries from occurring in the living room. But whether an intentional attempt at viral fame, or a bored copywriter’s sneaky attempt at slipping one past the boss, the Pony Up Daddy is just as surreal as it is ridiculous.
Featuring children dressed up in an assortment of outfits, Pony Up Daddy boasts “Whether you’re a mounted policeman or knight… just grab on and hold tight for a pony ride day or night!”
The Pony Up Daddy comes in an assortment of colours, including ‘Bandit Black’ and ‘Princess Pink’, and retails for just under $AU32. The crazy part? They’re currently all sold out!
If you’re crazy (or adventurous) enough to get your hands on one, get back to us with a review?
It’s for science. We swear.